I miss him so much. It seems like the force and energy that I had inside of me keeping my emotions for him locked down so tightly has be dissolved. I've probably had one of the worse weekends since all of this happened some seven weeks ago. nameless; and I had gone through all of the proper channels one should before breaking up with each other the day before he killed himself. It was done correctly, but like every other time that we broke up it was like a game of hide and seek: he was the one hiding this time. I'm left counting to sixty with my eyes hidden in my sleeve, pulling away to find that he has found the most secret of hiding places. All attempts to search for him are futile.
He kept me warm.
I was his secret.
I long for him, and my heart bleeds.
I miss him so much.